01/09/2023 - VENICE 2023: The debut film from Dutch filmmaker Stefanie Kolk follows a young woman who has lost her baby in her unique grieving process

Aleksej Ovsiannikov and Frieda Barnhard in Milk

Delivering a dead baby is an unbearable contradiction, and simply hearing the clinical details of it makes you shiver. This is what occurs in the first sequences of Milk [+see also:
trailer
interview: Stefanie Kolk
film profile], the debut feature by Dutch director and screenwriter Stefanie Kolk, in competition at the 20th Giornate degli Autori of the 80th Venice Film Festival, centred on a young woman, whose son died in her womb prematurely, and who is about to follow the scrupulous instructions of the doctors to begin this delivery of the cruellest kind.

Robin (Frieda Barnhard) has her gaze lost in the distance, just like her loving husband (Aleksej Ovsiannikov); they are stunned by pain. As planned, even if the baby is no more, Robin’s breast still begins to produce milk, and the midwife who assists her shows her how to use the pump in order to free the udders and relieve the pain, until the milking stops naturally. But for Robin, throwing the milk in the sink each time becomes increasingly difficult, like severing the bond with her child, so she decides to start the paperwork to donate it to other mothers who might need it.

The bottles of maternal milk thus start to multiply and fill the fridge of the young couple, taking the place of frozen foods, until it even becomes necessary to acquire another freezer. At a certain point, however, a bureaucratic hiccup forces Robin to bring her mission to an end. There begin the internet searches, the reaching out to dedicated groups, the phone calls with women potentially interested in her milk, despite the infection that the young woman had some years earlier and which by law would prohibit her from donating her milk even though it is completely healthy. Robin doesn’t give up and it is obvious that she needs this – to give and to help other mothers – in order to find peace and surpass her grief. In the meantime, the woman also frequents a self-help group which prescribes long walks together in the woods and, most of all, absolute silence (the members of the group literally do not talk to each other), in the name of a discreet and respectful sharing of grief.

Silence is exactly the tool with which Stefanie Kolk represents the grief of this “missed” mother: her suffering is withheld, words are not needed to express it, her face is enough to express it all. Simply being present, in certain cases, comforts more than words can. This is also what Robin’s husband does, who participates in his wife’s suffering while always staying one step behind, never failing to provide her with precious support in the choices she makes. The gestures and the actions of everyday life repeat themselves: pumping the milk, storing it in the freezer, and then the walks with the support group, visits with parents and friends, the sense of bewilderment when finding oneself at home, on leave from work, with nothing to do. It may seem at times that the rhythm of the film slows down too much, but to enter these human connections made of looks, one needs time as well as empathy, which the director reveals she has in abundance.

Milk was produced by Lemming Film (Netherlands) in co-production with NTR. International sales are handled by Spanish outfit Bendita Film Sales.

(Translated from Italian)

Photogallery 31/08/2023: Venice 2023 - Milk

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Stefanie Kolk, Frieda Barnhard, Aleksej Ovsiannikov, Jules Elting, Emo Weemhoff, Zineb Fallouk
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