10/03/2025 - Violet Du Feng’s documentary is a lively and captivating exploration of China’s dating scene and, ultimately, a film about authenticity

Premiered at this year’s Sundance and now being showcased in the Special Screenings sidebar of the Thessaloniki International Documentary Festival, Violet Du Feng’s The Dating Game presents an insightful, often humorous, look at contemporary courtship in China, following three bachelors – Zhou, Li and Wu – throughout an intensive, week-long dating camp in Chongqing. With the guidance of married dating coaches Hao and Wen, these men attempt to transform themselves into more desirable partners, exposing not only their own insecurities, but also the contradictions of a modern dating culture that thrives on curated personas.

At the heart of the documentary is Hao, a flamboyant yet deeply conflicted figure, whose methods range from the questionable to the outright ridiculous. His approach to seduction is riddled with performative masculinity – encouraging his students to project an image of dominance and charisma that is at odds with their real selves. Wen, by contrast, emerges as a more grounded and introspective presence. As the camp progresses, she begins to question Hao’s philosophy, subtly challenging his teachings and even exposing fractures within their own marriage. The contrast between these two figures adds a fascinating meta-layer to the film, as it becomes clear that Hao himself is struggling with the very insecurities he is attempting to eradicate in his students.

Du Feng’s direction ensures that the movie remains engaging throughout, despite some uneven narrative structuring. While the primary focus stays on Hao and the bachelors, occasional shifts to the female perspective – such as a revealing segment on women who prefer virtual AI boyfriends to real-life relationships – are introduced sporadically, leaving some thematic threads underexplored. Nevertheless, these glimpses into the “other side of the barricade” provide thought-provoking takes on a dating landscape where authenticity is increasingly elusive.

Indeed, The Dating Game is ultimately a film about authenticity – about the tension between being oneself and becoming a more desirable version of oneself. This struggle manifests itself in moments that are both comical and poignant, from the bachelors’ awkward attempts at projecting confidence to the artificiality of their dating-app profiles, where they pose as affluent “mafia boys” or golf aficionados despite their working-class, rural backgrounds. The documentary wisely refrains from overt moralising, instead allowing the inherent absurdity of the situation to speak for itself.

Technically polished, with excellent pacing and crisp cinematography by Wei Gao, the film successfully balances observational comedy with deeper sociological reflection. The result is an engaging and accessible documentary that resonates beyond its immediate cultural context, offering a universally relatable exploration of modern dating anxieties. As dating increasingly becomes a performative act, with AI companions and self-improvement regimens replacing organic interactions, The Dating Game serves as both a mirror and a cautionary tale.

While at times overambitious in its scope, Du Feng’s documentary is a captivating and frequently hilarious work that should appeal to a broad audience across different demographics. That it remains without international distribution is something of a mystery – one would hope this situation changes soon, as The Dating Game has all the makings of a festival favourite and a wider conversation starter.

The Dating Game was produced by Fish+Bear Pictures (USA) and Violet Films (UK), in association with Bird Street Productions (USA), Ten Thousand Images (Norway) and Chicken & Egg Pictures (USA).