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FILMS / REVIEWS Netherlands

Review: I Shall See

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- Mercedes Stalenhoef’s debut feature explores the rough edges of a teenager’s journey after she loses her sight

Review: I Shall See
Aiko Beemsterboer in I Shall See

Contemplating the question of dreaming and blindness in her fiction debut, I Shall See [+see also:
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(which world-premiered at IFFR 2025), Dutch filmmaker Mercedes Stalenhoef lenses the story of a teenage girl, Lot (Aiko Beemsterboer), who loses her eyesight in a tragic turn of events. The coming-of-age drama is part of this year’s EUROPE! Voices of Women+ in Film programme, a European Film Promotion (EFP) initiative, taking place in June in cooperation with the Sydney Film Festival.

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Lot is an active teen and avid scuba diver, and at 17, her life is brimming with elation for what lies ahead. Just minutes into the film, that hope is shattered. Lot’s attempt to light a firework fuse during New Year’s celebrations ends in a devastating accident, leaving her with severe eye injuries caused by its searing flashes and debris. What unfolds next is Lot’s painful wrangle with the new reality, compellingly delivered by Beemsterboer. Diving into the complexity of this journey, the film reveals her path to acceptance as paved with denial. This is evident in Lot’s initial refusal to accept her disability (“I am not disabled,” she cries out to her mother), her reluctance to register with a rehabilitation centre, and even use a white cane (holding out hope that her vision may improve, with the stick perhaps signifying a premature admission of her predicament).

Her journey is further complicated by the trials of coming of age, which come with their own pains and questionable choices. The film probes how blindness compounds these shifts, reshaping notions of intimacy, autonomy and agency. In one poignant scene, Lot must call over a family member to check her pants for signs of her period. In another, mildly inebriated and visibly uneasy with her pals’ conversation about the upcoming finals and college plans, she vows to “outdo” them all.

Beemsterboer is flanked by Minne Koole, portraying a young man named Micha, and Edward Stelder, playing Ed, an older, father-like figure to Lot. Micha and Ed form a vital part of her support system at the rehabilitation centre, with the trio dabbling in assorted workshops, swapping adventure stories and half-truths, and often turning to the comforts of drinking, smoking and sleeping to cope with the strain of their shared condition. In this new reality, dreaming offers respite from “the blind world”. In Lot’s dreams, her eyes are unscathed, and she can still see, which only makes the return to her waking life all the more unbearable. That begins to change after a chat with Micha, who confides that all he desires is sleep “precisely because [he] can see then”. She now cherishes her dreams, too, even reaching for sleeping pills to steal a few hours of shut-eye.

Through much of its 96-minute running time, the camerawork (courtesy of Mark van Aller) remains faithful to Lot’s experience, trailing her from scene to scene. Focusing on her face, the camera deliberately resists full views of other characters, who appear only as brief glimpses or voices orbiting her. The use of tight framing is also effective in capturing Lot’s world, which has now contracted to her body’s immediate reach – be it bits of faces, surfaces or the cane brushing the ground. These shots alternate with her PoV, which is obscured by dark patches and blurs. The film employs cool tones to reflect the protagonist’s emotional withdrawal, which contrast with the radiant dream sequences. Entry into these dreams is often marked by elemental visual or auditory motifs – fire, wind or (the pull of deep) water – accompanied by kaleidoscopic sound design by Michel Schöpping. As for the performances, they shine in scenes depicting the rougher stretches of Lot’s journey, rich in intensity and emotional highs and lows. Some scenes, however, reveal a need for quieter, more emotionally nourished moments.

I Shall See is a production by Dutch outfit Labyrint Film, which is also in charge of its world sales rights.

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